Going along with “Why I Write” to “When I Write”…this is from a writing exercise I did in July 2005.
When I write I feel the scratch of the pen crossing the page and I wonder what I will read when I get to the end of the line. When I write I sometimes feel challenged, sometimes set free, other times I cringe at the idea of writing, thinking I have to say something profound . When I write I want to just write, to let loose on the page, not fret over structure, spelling and such. At least not for now. When I write my heart wants to soar, to take off singing words to plan on the page. When I write I scan the surface of things around me for food. I want to dig deeper, deeper into me to dig up, pull out the voice that is me, who am I when I write? What does my voice sound like? What does she have to say? When I write i see the blank page, clear, white, no lines and I want to freeze. When I write I see objects around me and I write to deeper, deeper down into life that surrounds and penetrates me, makes me who I am and helps shape who I can become. When I write I see the possibility of depth, of deeper meanings and stronger connections. I don’t always see this at the time I am writing, often I see in retrospect, over my shoulder, through the lidded eyes of sleep when my brain is at rest and my heart breaks open. When I write I see, or am more likely to see with the eyes of my soul. When I write I discover new connections and re-realize old ones. When I write I know more than I think I know. When I write I discover m, over and over again. When I write I discover we are connected in ways I would have never imagined, you and me, me and them, us and nature, the world we live in. When I write I discover we do more than just exist. We are greater than we know. I discover God in life when I write, God in the tiniest flower or in the glorious rainbow. When I write I discover the joy of discovery itself.